The Sound of Silence

I want to start with I really love my girls more than anything else in the world and I would lay down my life for them BUT god do I miss silence!!


Before I had kids I had a stressful highly paid job, I worked 70/80 hours a week. My husband used to work away a lot during the week so, I got to spend a lot of time on my own. People used to say I don't know how you do it, don't you get lonely or scared being on your own? And my answer was always no, I love it! I can go where I want, do what I want, go to bed early, watch what I want.. I like my own company... I would finish work, sometimes go to the gym, go home, have tea, a long bath and then watch TV or read in bed, it was bliss.

AND in comparison to looking after 2 little ones 24 hours a day, 7 days a week it was a bloody doddle.

Now I am a stay at home mum with an almost 3 year old who NEVER stops talking, asking questions, wanting to play. She started walking and talking at a very young age, to me she never seemed like a baby and now she never stops! All day, every day from the minute she opens her eyes it's "Mummy" "Mummy" "Mummy". Then there is Baba who is 17 months old and she also never stops, she isn't really talking yet so she gabbers to me in Chinese (or German if you saw my previous blog) all day long, that's when she isn't screeching, shouting or clinging to my leg crying! 


Pre kids I was very intolerant of people with children, sat at home all day, watching Jeremy Kyle!!! What are you people moaning about?? It must be so easy... Blah Blah Blah!! All I can say is what goes around comes around and I have been well and truly made to eat my own sodding words, both during pregnancy (Your only pregnant, whats wrong with you?? I had the worse pregnancy ever!!) (serves me right, I know, I know) and also since having the girls. Its hard work, I feel awful if I say to the girls, just give me a minute but then I can't be on all the time! Mummy guilt is the most awful thing ever (I feel another blog coming on).


But I really do miss the silence at times, my nerves are shredded, my ears ring but I keep telling myself only another 3 years and they will both be at school.. That will go quick? Right???